I'm Sad
I’m sad.
The last time I felt this same sad feeling was when I found out that my mom’s sick. The possibility of losing my mom made me sooooo sad that every time the thought crosses my mind, I cry.
Tears instinctively falling. Lost appetite and energy. Lack of sleep. Disturbing dreams. Missing zest for life and living.
January 1999. I found out that I had passed the entrance exam for Quesci. Wow, a science high school…I’ll be going in a science high school. My parents were ecstatic. I was happy--- but sad at the same time. Studying in Quesci would mean leaving Miriam, and all my friends there.
Fast forward to March of the same year, there was a special program made for graduating students, specifically, the Grade 7 students, the Turnover. It was also an event that would signify the “passing of responsibilities” as seniors of the batch from the Grade 7 batch to the Grade 6 batch. It wasn’t an event made for sixth graders like me who would also be leaving the school. But during the ceremony (which was held at the MMJ Court at 6 in the evening), when a presentation about grade school was shown, I broke down. That time, I was sitting beside Lizette and Diana and I could see Margaux in the front row. Mrs. Torres (one of my favorite teachers) was standing near our seat. And Special Memory was being played.
March 2003. High School Graduation. Again, all of my favorite people were beside me, and Kessy, the object of my interest was seated behind me. We promised not to cry, because we know we’ll be studying at the same university in college, we’ll still be seeing each other the following day for our clearance, and we’d still be in touch. I was teasing Tetel for crying, but still I found myself crying after I saw her cry.
1st year college, Summer. I found out that Ralph had a girlfriend.
During those times, I felt the same thing days after.
Tears instinctively falling. Lost appetite and energy. Lack of sleep. Disturbing dreams. Missing zest for life and living.
And now, at this very moment, I’m feeling those things all over again.
Tears instinctively falling. Lost appetite and energy. Lack of sleep. Disturbing dreams. Missing zest for life and living.
Am I about to lose or say goodbye to someone special again?
The last time I felt this same sad feeling was when I found out that my mom’s sick. The possibility of losing my mom made me sooooo sad that every time the thought crosses my mind, I cry.
Tears instinctively falling. Lost appetite and energy. Lack of sleep. Disturbing dreams. Missing zest for life and living.
January 1999. I found out that I had passed the entrance exam for Quesci. Wow, a science high school…I’ll be going in a science high school. My parents were ecstatic. I was happy--- but sad at the same time. Studying in Quesci would mean leaving Miriam, and all my friends there.
Fast forward to March of the same year, there was a special program made for graduating students, specifically, the Grade 7 students, the Turnover. It was also an event that would signify the “passing of responsibilities” as seniors of the batch from the Grade 7 batch to the Grade 6 batch. It wasn’t an event made for sixth graders like me who would also be leaving the school. But during the ceremony (which was held at the MMJ Court at 6 in the evening), when a presentation about grade school was shown, I broke down. That time, I was sitting beside Lizette and Diana and I could see Margaux in the front row. Mrs. Torres (one of my favorite teachers) was standing near our seat. And Special Memory was being played.
March 2003. High School Graduation. Again, all of my favorite people were beside me, and Kessy, the object of my interest was seated behind me. We promised not to cry, because we know we’ll be studying at the same university in college, we’ll still be seeing each other the following day for our clearance, and we’d still be in touch. I was teasing Tetel for crying, but still I found myself crying after I saw her cry.
1st year college, Summer. I found out that Ralph had a girlfriend.
During those times, I felt the same thing days after.
Tears instinctively falling. Lost appetite and energy. Lack of sleep. Disturbing dreams. Missing zest for life and living.
And now, at this very moment, I’m feeling those things all over again.
Tears instinctively falling. Lost appetite and energy. Lack of sleep. Disturbing dreams. Missing zest for life and living.
Am I about to lose or say goodbye to someone special again?
posted by izzie at
4:14 PM
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